Visit Jupiter!


One of my recent assignments was to write a commercial for people to visit the planet Jupiter. Here it is:

Jupiter is Moony!

It’s cheap! It’s great! It’s out of this world! Visit Jupiter, the fifth planet from the sun. And no problem about getting power: just bring a wind generator, winds here blow at 260 miles per hour! Just don’t step on Jupiter, or you will be smushed by the dense hydrogen and helium!

If you get bored, don’t worry: go to one of the moons. On Ganymede, a compass will even work because Ganymede has a magnetic field. Just don’t go to Io: volcanoes of that sulphuric stinkpot constantly go off (it’s not actually sulphur that stinks; usually it’s hydrogen sulfide $H_2 S$). If a stinkpot and a compass still aren’t entertaining, then there are six other moons to vist. Europa will make a nice but cold sail 15.5 miles under the surface of the ice.

So go to Jupiter and have the vacation of your dreams!